Happy Valentine's Day!

Emily Heller is a pretty funny comedian.  She tells a lot of jokes about relationships and being single.  My favorite quote of her’s is, “I’ve been single for a while and I have to say its going very well.  Like… its working out.  I think I’m the one.”  It has become a meme because it is hilarious, but it is also a really good way to think about being single.

Valentine’s Day is hard for singles, even singles that are generally happy with their single status.  There is a cultural assumption that people are more happy paired, even though that is often not the case, especially for women (https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/may/25/women-happier-without-children-or-a-spouse-happiness-expert).  As a result, singles are often focused on finding a good partner, and days like Valentine’s day serve as a reminder that a quality relationship remains elusive.

There is however a very important relationship that singles are in a great position to focus on - the relationship that we all have with ourselves.  People will come and go from our lives, kids grow up and leave home, partners may leave or pass, but we will always be there for ourselves.  It is important to make sure that we are in a loving and supportive relationship with ourselves.

We build good relationships with ourselves by taking care of ourselves, both mentally and physically.  We give ourselves opportunities to grow, and succeed.  We do things we love.  We seek help from outside sources when we need it.  We give ourselves praise when we deserve it, and learn from our mistakes instead of beating ourselves up over them.  We become the version of ourselves that feels good and right, and that we can be proud of.

For those of us that want to be paired, being awesome and feeling self confident is very attractive as well.  Taking good care of your self may help you find your perfect partner, and even if it doesn’t, you still become a happier more fulfilled version of you with a wonderful single life.

For those of you that have already found a wonderful partner, taking care of yourself is still important.  You cannot give to your relationship if you have nothing left to give.  As we are reminded on planes put your own oxygen mask on before you assist someone else.  You cannot care for others unless you care for yourself.  

To all of my readers, Happy Valentine’s Day!  I encourage you to treat yourself well today, and I hope that you are the best Valentine’s Day date you have ever had. 

The Happiness Project

For several years now Gerwerken Crafts has been about making things.  I have knitted and sewed and made my house a home.  I enjoy making things.  I like the feeling I get at the end of a project - the sense of accomplishment is a powerful motivator.  However, for more than two years, I have not made much that you can easily see or hold.

A craft is the application of skill or expertise in the creation of something that one desires. I have realized that the things that I truly desire are not objects that I can create. What I truly desire is daily happiness and a life I can look back on with contentment.

Over the past two and a half years, I have researched and experimented with methods for obtaining happiness. I have simplified and culled that which no longer served my purpose, and I have added things that contribute toward my peace. I have been learning a new craft and I have made a tremendous amount of progress toward becoming the happiest and best version of myself that I can possibly be. I still have a lot of work to do.  I will always have work to do because happiness is something that you have to work toward every day, and becoming better has only shown me how much further I have to go.

I plan to spend the rest of my life perusing happiness and becoming a better version of myself.  One of the ways I plan to do that is by sharing what I have learned with all of you because I believe that happiness breeds happiness and that part of becoming better is helping others to the best of our abilities.

To that end Gerwerken Crafts and the Hang Your Hat podcast will be changing focus a bit in the next year.  I will still be sharing the tangible things I create, but I will also be sharing the things that I do, and the things that I have learned that have made my life and myself better.  The focus of the blog will change from crafting things to learning to craft the best possible version of our lives.  I am calling this conversion the Happiness Project, and I am hoping that all of you will join me in it, and share what makes you happy so that we can all learn from each other and support each other’s journey.